Acad here WE Come!

Since it's already Academy days, we have so many free periods dedicated in practicing our field demo (as if!). Well free periods means a lot of time hanging out and bonding time with my classmates without thinking of our assignments, project...(and the list could go on).

Just this morning our section together with ubaya made a fiasco in front of the whole school. We're late for the practice. As usual the almighty and glory mahal are already in the grounds. Unfortunately ubaya did not have the chance to catch up with us because the music is already playing at that time. We are not yet ready when they played the music. We look danced worst than the prep. I'm so embarrassed because Ms. S told the fourth year teachers that our performance did not in every way could match the performance of the day 1 participants. I'm so pissed because the one to be blame are the mahal. They did not inform us earlier that we will already perform. Nonetheless, we are still the wrong ones in the eyes of the teachers. What can we do? We didn't know what time we will practice.

So much of th I-hate-the-all-glory-mahal mode. Look at the bright side. We bonded so well and we don't have classes most of the day (except Eco). Another thing pa pala is when Lea S and Chesca accidentally threw a ball to Ms. F. Lea S. did not intentionally throw the ball (MY ball for your information) in Ms. F's way but she intentionally threw to Chesca. To our shock it bounced in Chesca's head and bump in Ms. F's head. She did not even look at us. I think she is controlling her anger to us. I'm sorry Ms. F. It's not our intention to ruin your day with a ball.

But apart from the above catastrophes of the day it's all fine. Though I'm sad because our LAST Academy days are drawing near. I don't want all of these to end. I'm not yet satisfied. There is a deep yearning in the pit of my stomach that I want ot fulfill. I can't stand the mere thought next year we are not part of this anymore. That we are nothing but one of the so-called 'outsiders'.

It's hard to do something when you knew in your heart that all of these are lasts of our high school life. I want to stop the moment and just cherish each moments without thinking we will end up saying goodbye to all of these...

I'm so sentimental now. But even if I just have been here for only four years, nothing can match with the memories Holy Spirit imparted with me. No matter what anyone would say Holy Spirit is still the best school I've known.

Ps. In two more days our Academy days will start. I'm so excited. Wish I could bond well with everyone. Our booth is dedication by the way. Hope we will earn more money this year.

Go BIGAY!!!

Ingredients of being one of a heck Maldita

It's been forever since I post my last entry. So many things happened. I can't find the right words to explain the whole course of events. So these are just some (and when I say some it's hardly one tenth) of the past events in my life.

We got are report cards. Surprise! I got lower grade in Physics than in Math. At least the grades are almost tolerable. Somehow i felt guilt because I knew i did not try my hardest to improve my grade in Elective physics which got me in this situation. I'm not really into grades this past months. I guess all the problems are taking the toll in my head. But don't worry, I will never let these things be a hindrance for me.

We also have a lot of dose of projects (problems) from our teachers. The most memorable is the term paper. Our group is in deep trouble with Ms. F. She hated our work. And she told us quoted "You cannot graduate next March if you will not pass the term paper." Talking about trouble. Many thought that the only reason why Ms. F is doing this is because she firmly believes that not all of us did it together. But in all honesty we help hand in hand to come up with that term paper. I just wish Ms. F's heart will warm up to us next time.

So much of the academic problems. My friend R is having love problems. And from the look of it I am one of her confidant. But sometimes all I wanna tell her is get a grip of herself because life won't end there. I mean they are not official and to set the record straight they had never been. I can't say if it's just a fling, infatuation or maybe the real thing. However, her constant rumbling get straight into my head. I can't help it! She is luckier than any girl I know (for that matter luckier than me). She doesn't need to have everything. Just take her and his time. There is no need to hurry because there is more in life.

I definitely feel I'm maldita now. There is so many things to think academic, social and emotional. I can be a good listener. You have my word that i won't utter a word to anyone and even let you rattle for hours. Sometimes there is a point when I can't hold onto my silence anymore. It's just a way for me to wake someone up that life never ever (mark my words) revolve to anyone. Problems come and go like opportunities in life.

Ps. I get so worke up with this things. Hope tomorrow will wave out the clouds and bring out the sky.

Beginning of the End

Well what can I say?! This is one hell of a week (even if we're just in the middle of it). So many things had happened (especially the calculus thingy). But I guess everything has it's reason why things work out this way.

First off, calculus. I'm speechless... I did not failed but it's rather below what I had wanted it to be. I'm disappointed with the score more importantly with myself (didn't study that much). I get what I deserve. But Ms. Love reacted violently. I think she is mad to us. That's why last Tuesday she discussed our new lesson in FULL volume (not kidding!). Those at the back were complaining about her way of discussing what more pah with me. I'm in front and in the middle so full blast ako. She's quite scary. While she's discussing I had goosebumps all over me because of her (partly because of the aircon). But what can I complain that's Ms Love (nuff said)...

And now I definitely think is a new beginning. First semester had finally passed our way (yehey!). Five months from now we will part our ways ( yan ay kung gragraduate). I still can't believe that every little thing from now on is our last. Ayaw ko pang grumaduate. I don't want to end being a HSAian. Lalo pa now na we are so bonded. It's like there is a bomb ticking away the time left for us to be together. Mamimiss ko ang lahat lahat. High school life is incomparable to college life.

Everything is something like Now or Never (like in hsm 3). The teachers reminding us that sooner we will have to leave that all of this our just preparation of the unknown. It's not like I'm afraid to be in college but I enjoy being in high school. Every bit of it is so important. How I wish I can stop time and be a high school student forever.

But I can't just dwell from what is inevitable. We all have to face today. Cliche it maybe but we have to live each day as if it is the LAST. We cannot foresee our future what we can do now is to live each day as it is. Life is beautiful (especially high school life). We just have to learn how to get into the rhythm.

Ps. Someone told me that we will not have our JS prom because. Apparently a parent of a third year student is against it (President pa ng PTA). But we, THE SENIORS, will not let our high school life end without having our last JS Prom (huhuhu..;(() . So help us God for this battle! (I really really want to have prom!!!)

Tomorrow is Unlikely to be Today

Before I share more about my trip to hell (oops! I mean Baguio), I'll first share some things about today. For starters, we got some of our subjects grade result in our recent periodical test. Most of my score in the subjects we re-checked are tolerable and manageable (as what sir C would say). I mean it's not really that low or that super high but I still manage to get decent ones. But what I'm afraid of is tomorrow's subjects; English, Basic Physics, Elective Physics, and Basic Math (kulang na lang Calculus. thank God! mga pangnose bleed) . Wow! Tomorrow will be one heck of a day. All I wish now is to survive tomorrows surprise (grabe parang may gera ha) without passing out or getting any headache because of the test results. All of those subject are so hirap pa naman kasi. Even though mulitple choice nakakahilo pa rin. Wish me all the luck in the world. I guess I need more than luck for what is to come tomorrow. Good night!

P.s. I still didn't forget of the continuation of my other posts. I'll pluck up the courage maybe tomorrow or the next day to continue it.

On a High! with High School Musical 3

Gosh! Love the High School Musical!!! Can't help to sing along. Last Thursday while we're in Baguio, we watched High school Musical 3. It was about 11:20 p.m. when it ended. I'm kind of exhausted but it's worth it. By the way it's the only good thing that happened in Baguio.

I'm kind of disappointed with the plot because they try to put so many stuff that I got confused withe scenes. But I still love the songs because of it's energetic vibe. How I wish I could be in that movie.

Well I think I need to stop here because I'm so tired of the trip. So many things that happen. Next time I'll write about it but for now I'll rest first.

p.s. This is just a draft. When I regain my energy (and discard my laziness) I'll make my proper entry for this one and also about my Baguio trip which gone far worst than what I expected.

A Dream Miles Away

October 26, 2008 at exactly 2:48 p.m. in the afternoon...

I'm not in the mood for anything at that time. All I wanted is just to go home, review for some of my subjects for the test tomorrow and sleep. But as I turned around, I saw in the corner of my right eye, a familiar face passing by my side. I hold my breath for a second or (maybe...) two. There he is, walking ahead of me, looking straight forward and not even minding me. I'm there looking at his back, wishing the world will stop and preserve that very moment. I wanted to call out his name maybe even say hi or hello. But a STRONG FORCE STOP ME from whatever I'm planning to do. It brings back the memories of the past which halted my body and spirit from committing the mistake I'm about to do. Then after a couple of seconds, the event started to sink in... He maybe physically close but would still forever be a far away DREAM.

I saw him up close for the first time since (I don't know) a century ago. Never would I imagine I'll see him there at that very moment. Honestly I'm not prepared. All I did at that time is just look at him and try to make sure he is the one who just passed by. It's as if my world stop to turn and all I could think is he is there. My mom tried to tell me there is a tricycle passing by but all I did was just look at his retreating back.

Even after we rode the tricycle I still glance at him. I crane my head to have a better look at him. He was wearing a pink tee and faded jeans. He looks so thin as if he is not eating enough. It's been a long time since I saw him close by. I'm caught off-guard. I'm really expecting to see him once in a while. I know he does live around the area. But to see him just like that is another thing for me.

I tried to be ready but when I saw him yesterday all my plans were put to waste. I don't know if he saw me because I have my back on him. Though he saw me I doubt if he would remember me. But if he recognizes me surely he would not even bother to say hi to me. Because for him we are nothing more than the word STRANGERS and I have to live with that.

Up until now I still can't get over that fact. In my heart I wanted him to even look me in the eyes and not just passed by me. It hurts to look at his back and not be able to do anything.

He is my crush for almost a millennium now. I know he already have so many girlfriends. I also knew he broke his heart for a couple of times. I'm like HIS stalker. But I can't help it. I regretted so many things I've done in the past which hinder us from being friends. Well it is already a history now. All I could do is hope for the future.

We are strangers I guess I'm okay with that now. I chased him for seems like a million years already. I always look at his back retreating away from me every time. So I learned to give up and let go. I learned to put aside my fantasy from the reality.

He is a MILLION MILES AWAY from ME, A forever DREAM that can NEVER be REAL. He is always CLOSE YET in a FAR away land.

But from time to time I still have high hopes in the bottom of my heart that maybe just maybe I can somehow LESSEN the DISTANCE between the two of US and eventually BE FRIENDS.

"SHE" is my walking NIGHTMARE

I just can't help it! A lot of things are going on my mind. Maybe it is partly because October 25 is drawing near (meaning periodical test nahhh!!). But maybe because I've just came across a blog of an old friend. For someone whom you lost contact to it is a blessing. Her blog is somehow interesting until I've came across with something I didn't like.

It's not like she wrote point-blank it is I whom she is talking about but most of the things she wrote is pointing directly unto me. I don't want to be a brat or maldita but I'm really PISSED OFF! I'm just minding my own business away from all of them but they still could find a way to ruin it all. It is not like we were enemy in fact we WERE friends. I couldn't find an answer to why she and her (no comment) cousin is doing all this things to me.

I just need PEACE at this point in time. I don't really need problems because I've got tons of them. What I need now is a FRIEND not ENEMIES. Hope they would only mind their own business.

Because if they will even try to get IN my LIFE and turn it to the WORST,
I would NOT HESITATE to get even with them.

'Retro Way'

I forgot to share about something. Last October 11 we had an informal class pictorial. We had to wear clothes according to the theme of the class. Our class had the "retro" theme. We had so much fun dressing up. There's just one hook, the (ALMIGHTY AND HIGH) STAR SECTION wanted to have a "vintage theme" which is almost alike with ours. So we had a misunderstanding with them but in the end we proved we are the brightest of them all. It is so much fun. Though I didn't brought my camera (we are not allowed to but others insisted) I still have the best pictorial I ever had in my entire life. Actually my classmate Lea (we have the same name) brought a vauxwagon. It's so hilarious because it won't start so the boys in our class had to push it.

Now I'm going to share some of the photographs of our class we took that day.

Okay! That's all folks (Sorry Ms. F I can't help it). These so far are the only ones I can upload (Actually it's a hassle to upload all of it). Hope you enjoy this as much as WE do!

Problems Like No Other

It has been almost a month since I've posted here. I guess my life at this point in time is in the period of what many of us will call 'under reconstruction'. No one can really blame me for it. After all the grand revelations revealed to me for the past weeks, no wonder I'm really not in the mood for anything.

I've tried so many times to write some of my thoughts but I always come up with nothing. So I've decided not to post any of it. It seems so 'emo' and nonsense for me (no offense there). It's not that I hate being an 'emo' nor do I hate those who do. Though I find it not necessary to kind of 'shout to the world' my problems. But I what I do like on being an emo is that you can put into writings your feelings and thoughts. Enough of this. I'm starting to drab again.

Well let's go on to the main topic. There are so many events that happened during the weeks I didn't post. I'll start to the 'minor events'. Well it is not really minor but I really have to say it (in this case, write it). I don't know how to say this because I'm not really proud of this stunt our batch pull off this year. Uhmm.... You know when you're in high school there are so many temptations around especially when it comes down in... CHEATING.

Said so i'm so ashamed of this. You know we've been discovered. One from the almost 280 senior students pluck up the courage to speak up and tell the teachers about it. Then other students from the other sections folllow suit. So naturally all the teacher are so strict with us now. Two of our teachers got mad with our batch because one section has been questioned by the higher ups. Then they drag the names of different teachers telling that they are the one in fault because they are not so strict and diligent enough to behave the students. Now, most of the teachers are really mad at us.

But there is a hook in that one. Our section is the only one in the five which do not yet to confirm the cheating incidents in our classroom (even the cream section do. I was told about it). So now the teachers do all their best effort to nudge our conscience. I know it's true because I do cheat when it comes to assignment and one incident during our economics but I don't know what to do. It's difficult to put myself and the others in a situation which I knew will be a big trouble.

The major event wll be shared next time. I haven't had the enough courage to share it now. maybe next time I'm one hundred and one percent ready.

Calculus Gone WRONG (in a GOOD way)

What a DAY! So Many things happened for the passed 24 hours of my life. It seems to me that God is really punishing me for all the bad deeds I've done in the past.

But I think the highlight of everything was when my favorite (note the sarcasm) calculus teacher, Ms. Love asked me to explain a number from the assignment which I don't know. Well I think Ms. Love found out I just copy paste (meaning copy from my classmate) my answer. She tried to embarrassed me but maybe for others she succeed but for me she didn't. I calmly repeat the whole process in her face. I think she expected that I could not perform it in front of her but I proved her wrong. I did my best not to laugh because she is trying way to hard to point out my error.

I stand my ground. I did not let Ms. Love to put my spirits down. After all I'm a strong-willed person. The more you put me down the more I am propelled to fight. Lucky for her I am not in the mood to play her game.

No matter what happened i learned my lesson. Huwag magpahuli (Just joking!). I know it is my fault I tried (but failed) to cheat. But for her to put me in the spot and try (and also failed *hahaha!) to drag my spirits to hell, is a far cry from what I felt. Truthfully at first I'm dead scared but towards the part wherein I am re-doing the answer, I felt elated and content that I was given the chance to defend myself from her accusations. I do cheat in the assignment (not all the time and only at that level never in tests or quizzes) but I make sure I know the lesson well.

The whole experience is worth my time. I think it really test my skills in reacting in pressured situations. And my classmate's praises for me on how I handled it made me realize that it is really a nice experience. Pero 'wag niyo kong gayahin. Cheating won't do you any good even if it is just a home work.

But to Ms. Love thank you for everything you've done. It's such a nice memory! But SENIORS' still the champion. No matter what Juniors will always be the fourth. you can't change that by getting mad at us.

Nice day to all!

Random Inspirations

I'm just bumming around (meaning walang ginagawa) all day. Imagine my surprise when I discovered there is a new entry from kuya Chris Tiu's blog (feeling close kami).

So I've just read the new entry of kuya Chris. It is entitled 'A Win FROM Him, and FOR Him'. Honestly, the content really touched my heart. Remembering now, I've waited since last Thursday for kuya chris to post a new entry about ADMU-DLSU game 2 best-of-three finals. And it is worthwhile to wait even for another hundred of years.

I am so excited and thrilled when I saw the new post though I felt uneasy reading it at first. It felt somehow I'm eavesdropping on something very private and personal. Kuya Chris described his thoughts and feelings during the game in the most intimate way anyone could have done. It's as if I'm not reading a blog but hearing the whole events first-hand. I'm so lucky to have the opportunity of reading it. Congratulations agin to kuya Chris!

I also salute kuya Chris for his dedication in putting God as the center of all. Not all players (and people) are like him when it comes to glory. Most of us forget to even say a little thank you for the blessings we receive. So I'm hands down to kuya Chris!

Hindi naman obvious that I'm so hooked up in kuya Chris' blog (slight lang). It is just un to read about the thoughts of a player you watch on t.v. And to know that he is as human as we are and not someone who don't feel or think about anything else but basketball.

Hope I could have other chances of reading more about kuya Chris' life.

Well GO ATENEO!

ONE BIG FIGHT!!!

Expect the Unexpected

Life of a fourth year student is really complicated and unexpected! Many surprises are in store in our every day life. Sometimes there are so many hassles that all I wanted is for the week-end to come. But other days, I can't help but wish the week can extend for another seven days. There are so many happenings all around. May be it good or bad, it is part of the challenge.

Awhile ago in our English class, we are asked to make our outline for our term paper. We thought of getting AIDS as our general topic but she told us it is too broad for a term paper. So we are stuck in thinking for the right topic which will suite her taste. But we spend our free time during Intramural bumming around (yelling SENIORS!). So now our group haven't thought about our title more importantly (*gasp!) our narrowed-down topic. So when Ms. F (my English teacher) started to look around in each group, we were so nervous. Even more nerve-cracking, she chose to went in our group first. How I wished the ground will swallow me up! But to our surprise, she reacted the opposite way we expected.

Ms. F: That's the way to start it....(blah...Blah). I like it... 'Modes of Transmission' (Luckily, I'm the one who thought of it! *clap clap clap!) Blah...blah..

Now I'm in seventh heaven. We got 95 for our second group activity. To top it all she boast that one group got 92 for the first activity and 95 for the other and (surprise!) we are that group. I never expected it to happen. Guess that highlighted my day today. And even more my friend in the other class told me Ms. F told them about our class improving in English class. That is a whole lot of praise coming from the mouth of Ms. F!

Now I think there is nothing that could dampen my spirits. Everything seems in its right place. Ateneo winning, getting a perfect score in English and TLE (forgot to share), and being with the comfort of my best buds. How I wish this could happen every single darn day! Never mind. I'll just give my best on Monday. But now i need a big dose of my favorite remedy to all my illnesses and that is COMPUTER!

Take care! MUWAHH!

p.s. thanks to C and A for being with the worst days of my high school life!

Blue Eagles soar HIGH!

OH MY GOSH!!! ATENEO WON THE CHAMPIONSHIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

September 25, 2008 the most awaited best-of-three finals of UAAP had finally ended with a loud bang from the well-oiled blue eagles. At last, after all these years the blue eagles finally achieved their well-deserved win. After game1 and 2, they finally proved their might. With 62-51 score at the end in favor for the eagles, there is no single doubt that ateneo finally defeated last years champion, dlsu.

I can't stop jumping around our house today. Even my sister can't help but jump around like me. I'm so ecstatic with the result of the game. Although I'm not YET an official atenean, (I took up ACET. Hopefully I'll passed.) I'm still an avid fan of the whole team.

Ang guwapo ni Chris Tiu. He is so hot!!!(*fanning myself furiously) I can't help it! Well, who can blame me?! He is such a hottie as well as the whole team especially when they started to cry. When the whole team started to cry and they took a close-up of him crying, it's just so cute (I want to pinch their cheeks). They deserved to win this.

I'm a little bit sad because I'm not able to watch the whole game. Wish I had the opportunity to watch it live. But still, seeing their happy faces on T.V. is enough for me (though my heart is aching).

Well what's done is already done. I'm happy and contented now. Hope next year will be just like this one. The traces of the 2006 lost is now completely erased by the joyous triumph this year. Blue is really the color of the year.

Congratulations to all the BLUE EAGLES! A blessed year to all of you!

GO ATENEO!!!

ONE BIG FIGHT!!!

Awhile ago...

My filipino teacher lost her patience on us awhile ago. I think we really pushed her up to her limit. But the fact that she just walk away and do not explain her feelings made it difficult for us to understand her point. Well, it is a fact that when you put a whole bunch of teenager in a room you can expect a lot of chit-chatting going around. Maybe she felt bad but I don't think what she did is the most appropriate thing to do. We just want to have fun and enjoy our last high school days. She can't blame us of enjoying each others company.

Though I have (slight) hard feelings towards my teacher, I still want to apologize to her. But I'm not sure how to do it. Wish i can express my sincerest apology to her without her being mad at me.....

Most Awaited Moment

I have waited for three years to finally yell "We won" on top of my voice. I still could not get over the fact that we actually won last September 20 on the cheering competition in our school.

Of course we, seniors, put our very best effort to make this last competition the best and most remarkable of all. After all, this is our last chance to prove them we worth more than what they thought we were. It is like there is no room for any mistake. We have to do it now or regret it for the years to come.

Well I'm happy and contented now we know we won. But trust me, I felt sick while waiting all day for the result to be announce. It is a crazy ride for all of us. We all knew deep in our hearts how much we wanted to succeed this. We lost when we were in second year so the pressure for us is great. Most of them thought we could not perform well but we prove them wrong.

As I heard the announcer utter the word seniors for first place, I could not refrain myself from jumping around and waving my blue balloon in the face of other year levels. My friends are also jumping like an idiot. Even worse (or better :)) the whole batch is jumping around and chanting "SENIORS!" TO THE WHOLE SCHOOL. The feeling is surreal. Never thought, I would be that happy in my life.

Being a senior is fun. Although most of our experiences now is our last, we still find ways to held up our sighs and cherish the moments until it last. Being a senior is not an everyday experience. There is always a clock that seems to tick away the opportunities we encounter. Well that made it much more exciting and thrilling to be a SENIOR.

I'll never ever forget the moment I sang out loud "S-E-N-I-O-R-S GO! LET'S GO SENIORS!"
It's one of the few moments I'm glad I've been born.